Portlock...

She sits forlorn, at a finger of floating pier at Fisherman’s Terminal. The years have not been kind to her and she looks now more a victim of neglect than faithful service at sea. The For Sale signs, coupled with No Trespassing warnings, look as old as she does. As I look at her, I imagine a fresh coat of paint where now there are streaks of rust below the scuppers, chips, scrapes, and visible dry-rot just above the waterline. By her lines I can tell she’s an old converted Halibut Schooner, from a time before sail gave way to steam. Her prow, once strong and prominent is now weathered and battered by the countless weighing of anchor, which itself looks more like a permanent fixture I wouldn’t trust in the best of holding grounds. Her masts, now shorn, look to be little more than antenna and radar towers with some brackets to hold up the equipment they use to haul barn door sized Halibut up off the ocean floor before they put a gun to their heads to kill them quick before they maul the fisherman on board with their wild and legendary thrashings. Her stern, built to handle a following sea in a North Pacific gale, has a swale that at one time was alluring and sexy but now sits tired and low in the water under the weight of the makeshift house that was added on probably years ago. I wonder what stories she carries. I wonder how many men have boarded her with dreams of adventure, expanse and the thrill of the catch. Dreams of the wealth they will fetch from their perilous labor. I can’t help also thinking of the broken dreams that live aboard this boat, each one leaving its mark on her as they fight and scratch to pull fish from the ocean floor and return home empty handed. Or the broken dreams of those who never got to return home, but instead suffered the cruel indifference of the sea. In the hands of men at sea, she looks like she’s worked harder than any horse or beast I’ve seen in the service of men. To see her is to grieve the indifference she’s endured and long for a time she can be put to rest – no longer suffering the dreams of unforgiving men in the unforgiving sea.